Hog on the hob with a knob...

...of butter!

A green-winged orchid in a meadow of buttercups

With all this summer weather who could blame me for lolloping around in a wild-flower meadow taking photos of green-winged orchids, meadow buttercups and looking for tasty treats when I strayed too far from the ice-cream van. Thankfully the list of wild ingredients in my neural recipe book is growing week by week and the latest addition is in abundance right now - Hogweed.

Common Hogweed - the one you CAN eat

Gardeners amongst you will probably be thinking 'hang on a minute, isn't that poisonous?' Fear not my foraging friends it is Giant Hogweed (Heracleum mantegazzianum) to which we bestow this label of danger, plain old Hogweed (H. sphondylium) itself is delicious.

The young leaf shoots collected from a few different plants

The downward-pointing bristles on the
stems of this carrot family member

Giant Hogweed, as its Latin generic name suggests, can grow to truly epic proportions, often more than five metres tall. Look out for slightly pointier teeth on the leaves and purple/red spots on the hollow stem of the plant. It also produces a sap which contains psoralens, chemicals that change your skins sensitivity to light leaving you extremely vulnerable to the sun's UV radiation. People have experienced the effects of these nasty chemicals just by brushing past the leaves of the plant and have continued to be at the mercy of them for several years after initial exposure! If that wasn't scary enough type 'Giant Hogweed burns' in Google images... Oh, and these burns often don't appear for twenty four hours or so after contact, so just when you thought you were safe...

But if you're still keen on eating plain old Common Hogweed (also known as cow parsnip) then please take care. Common Hogweed seldom grows taller than two metres and has a green stem often with a dull red ridge running down the side rather than purple/red spots. However, these characteristics are not as helpful as one would hope because the best grub is picked from the young plants that are still less than one metre high.

Go for the young leaf shoots before the leaves have a chance to open fully. I like frying them up and making the unopened leaf go nice and crispy whilst the stem stays lovely and succulent like an asparagus spear.

Not only is Hogweed delicious but it is also known as the 'love plant', it contains chemicals that act as genital vasodilators! For centuries it has been used as a treatment for impotence, sterility and frigidty, just don't confuse it with Giant Hogweed.

Beware of dragons, death and puns

As a freelancer I often find myself without work. On such occasions I would normally relish the opportunity to get outside and go for a wonder, but when the April showers come in the guise of successive tempests the idea of a foray has limited appeal. However, last week I decided to don my 'waterproof' trousers and march to a new patch of my local foraging territory armed with all manner of collecting devices.

"Advance our standards, set upon our foes
Our ancient world of courage fair St. George
Inspire us with the spleen of fiery dragons."
Richard III, act v, Sc.3.

As I stepped around a fairly large bog that obstructed my path I ducked under a low lying branch only to find a few familiar friends from autumns gone by - mushrooms! Saintly white in colour this fairy ring in spring could only be one thing - the St. George's mushroom. As I worked my way around the outside of the circle picking the best of the crop I felt the presence of a beast close by... Alas, not a mythical, fire-breathing dragon but instead a mighty roe deer buck who had paused for a few seconds before prancing off into the woodland.

Further down the path I discovered two more half-rings of St George's and in total I foraged over a kilo of protein-packed, free food leaving the vast majority of what was on offer. Or at least I hoped they were St George's, I had never actually found any before...

" Inspire us with your mushroomy
goodness to consume thee"
Andy Wakefield, blogspot 2012

On my return home I started my usual investigatory routine with the aid of four trustworthy books. White flesh, gills, stems and spores all hinted towards a positive ID, as did the strong smell of raw pastry. Although, being several months out of practise I decided to contact author of 'River Cottage Handbook No.1 Mushrooms' John Wright for reassurance. With his kind guidance and approval there was only one final way to found out if they were eaters or not... give a punnet of them to my boss to eat.

Following his survival I made a second crusade to recover yet more hidden relics and last night I made a creamy St. George's lasagna topped with oak smoked cheddar and homemade blushed tomatoes - legendary!

Long live rainy days in spring that yield saints I say, cry God for Harry!, England and St.George! Huzzah!

I'm a Rocket Man

My first wild rocket plant!

It's taken some patience and some optimistic leaf nibbling (not recommended!) but I've finally found my first batch of Perennial Wall Rocket. In the battle of 'Forager vs Weed' yours truly has prevailed victorious.

Nettles, sorrel and bittercress are brilliant in their own right but finding and eating truly wild rocket is incomparable. Supermarkets sell minuscule bags of the stuff for as much as a couple of quid, so as I bagged myself a bunch for free I justifiably felt pretty smug. The only price I had to pay were a few disapproving looks from passers by as I squatted on the pavement with an old carrier bag chewing weeds.

Diplotaxis tenuifolia grows to about half a metre above ground. Between May and September it produces hermaphrodite, yellow flowers typical of its compadres in the brassica family. The seeds then usually ripen between Jun and October. In most cases supermarket rocket is a completely different species (Eruca vesicaria sativa) but in my humble opinion D. tenuifolia is tastier as it has a stronger, nuttier flavour.

The beninning of the ultimate salad...

These little rascals could be added with other foraged spring leaves such as dandelion, sorrel, corn salad, hairy bittercress, sea beet and wild garlic. If you're cooking for your lady friend and want to really impress with your manly foraging skills, but also want to demonstrate your feminine caring side then use wild garlic flowers. The white petals will work beautifully as a poncey but edible garnish -just don't use too many otherwise your breath may well nullify your seductive preparation!